I've got a unicorn's horn in the middle of my forhead,
And the antlers of a stag on either side;
I've got pointed ears are something like a deer's,
Or something like and elf's, I can't decide.
I've got long green hair to match my flowing emerald mane
That turns red with the oak leaves in the fall;
With my goat-like eyes it should come as no surprise
That I've got feathered eyebrows and that isn't all.
My mother never talks about that orgy,
And I can't really blame her much although
I would love to see the guest list for that party,
And if there's another like it, let me know.
Well, my vampire's fangs make kissing kind of awkward,
Like the set of gills implanted in my neck;
But my chest and arms aren't the least of all my charms;
They somehow turned out human, what the heck?
I've got phoenix wings well rooted in my shoulders,
And I hope that you like legs 'cause I've got four:
The furry forward pair would make a lion stare,
'Cause they end in dragon's claws that wreck the floors.
I suspect my body's something like a centaur's,
Though my fur is somewhat tiger-like you'll find,
And if you feared that the legs in front were weird,
You should only see the pair that walk behind.
They start off looking something like a horse's,
But they're covered up with feathers, not with hair,
And they end in hooves like an antelope's, which prooves
That there's nothing that the traffic will not bear.
Now my tail is really something very special,
Though you wouldn't think so seeing it at all;
For it's long and green, like my hair and mane you've seen,
And like them it turns red with every fall.
But beneath the hair, which is really quite attractive,
The stinger of a manticore is hid,
So you can surely see, when you look at all of me,
That I really wish I knew what mother DID.
'Cause I want to go;
If there's another like it, let me know.